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The Cleanest Kids Since COVID19

Bath time with my two babies simultaneously. It's always been a struggle for me. #twoundertwo

"Just throw them in the tub!"
"Give them a bath to pass the time!"
"Oh, just let them play in there, it's so much FUN!"

These are frequent lines from people (people who aren't me) that have not actually witnessed my baby being body-slammed by my toddler in an innocent effort to show him her "baby shark" act. These are from people who feel badly for my long and exhausting days, who just want to offer a suggestion that in theory seems FUN, but in reality is HELL.

I hate the shape of my kid's bathroom vanity and how it prevents me from being near both of them at all times. I hate that my 2 year old is a little more sturdy and aggressive during play, so she drowns out my 1 year old with a cup of water. I hate how my baby is learning to walk and when he stands up in the tub, all I can imagine is him slipping and hitting his head on the stupid soap holder made of porcelain. I hate that in order to get one child out and safely transport them in a towel into pajamas, I must leave the other unattended possible, even if only for a minute. I hate all of it.

BUT there is only one upside to all of this. Since we have been home mid-March until now, my kids have never been this clean. They are being bathed multiple times a week! That's a huge increase of cleanliness for us. I mean before this crisis happened, I was at work all day and picked them up at 5, shuffled home for a speedy dinner, put #1 to bed, put #2 to bed, and finally took a deep breath. Now I have all day... now I can plan things out accordingly to start at 4PM, give them the early-bird dinner special, and do whatever the heck I want!

When I say they have never been this clean, I mean, I am not washing their hair with a baby wipe nearly as often as I used to. That's an improvement. I also have spent much more time watching my baby giggle as he learns to splash the water. I have also reveled in the way that my son (the baby) let's me wash his hair leaning back in my arm, while my daughter at almost 2.5 still engages her abdomen every time, as to not let her neck or feet come anywhere close to the water. Yea... she's the kid who prefers the shower already. #controlfreaktoddler

Of course, my photos show the 28 seconds of bliss before the storm, which is the photo I send to my mother, my grandparents, my family group whatsapp... That's the picture people think is the reality 24/7. But let's all stop lying to each other. It's moments after that photo is taken that all hell breaks loose.


The bath toys, the warm water, the smiles and the smell of fresh baby is still potent in my house. Some people say "wow, your kids still smell like babies!" and my simple answer is that's because they ARE babies. There are highs and lows, ups and downs, and perks and disadvantages to it all. I'm just trying to enjoy the ride.


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